Praha, Pivo, Prosim

Ok well, there have been a few interesting/fun events over the past few weeks so I’m here to share them with you.

Scavenger Hunt

Well, I’m not sure how technically correct the scavenger hunt title is but alas, that’s the name we used at the time. Essentially, it was just a fun way to get out and about on a Saturday afternoon and a reason to make multiple stops for pivo.
A few items from our lists to see/do/photograph included: a gun, a baby with a big head, a cowboy hat, a sombrero, someone holding two sausages, a cat, a mullet, bright hair, a Segway, a horse, etc.

An Impromptu Trip to a Castle

The Czech Republic has a plethora of castles everywhere. It’s pretty awesome to be able to see a castle for a day trip. Last Sunday, I visited Krivoklat. Its’ a short 60-75 minute train ride from town. Domestic train travel is really quite inexpensive and easy to navigate so off I went. The weather was quite cold & gray but it’s a castle so that makes it doable in my book.

I took the train from Hlavni Nadrazi (main station) to Beroun and transferred to a teeny funky looking train to reach Krivoklat. As is typical for most castles, Krivoklat is on a hill therefore when approaching it looks pretty awesome. The town (well, village really) is incredibly small–we’re talking population 40 or something. No, that’s an official Czech census statistic, I’m just sayin’….

There’s a short footpath from the train station to the ‘town’ and then visitors must walk up a respectable hill to reach the castle. Once at the castle there’s a main courtyard and at one end of the courtyard are a couple of Robin Hood looking dudes. There’s a table set up and they are shooting various forms of bows & arrows at targets and of course, any man, boy or child is attracted to such activity.

In no particular order I completed the following tasks: ate lunch, had a beer, walked up another hill, was a tourist, took scenic pictures, and peeked in the dungeon.

At this point I’ll mention that on the train to and from Krivoklat I was about the only person on any of the trains who did NOT have children or all the necessary child accoutrements. These people & their prams were freaking everywhere. Child overload.

Cesky Krumlov

Everyone I know has been telling me how lovely & adorable Cesky Krumlov is and how it’s a must see when in the C.R. They were right.

I hopped a train (again, cheap domestic travel–yay! 383Kc roundtrip = about 20$) on Friday afternoon headed towards Ceske Budejovice. From CB, I got on a bus to CK.

Cesky Krumlov is a really small town with a small permanent population. The summer is the peak time and from what I’ve been told many shops/places close up for the winter.

The Vltava (same river that runs through Prague) winds in and around CK thus making it even fucking cuter than it would be if it was riverless. The river makes big swooping loops and there’s a big castle that sits on a rocky hill above. I think it’s one of those places where it’s difficult to take a bad picture. There is a main square in the center with many little streets (with shops, restaurants & cafes) that surround the main square.

I arrived at about 5:30 so I found my pension which was, as the website indicated, at the ‘castle steps’. I could see the base of the tower from my window as the building is practically next door. Great location & a reasonable price. I did well!

Food….what to eat for dinner? Sorry, I just looked for a web link to the restaurant I chose and cannot find one. Booooo. A table of young & rowdy guys were next to me speaking some European tongue I’d never heard before. They were loud & obnoxious therefore, not Czech. They kept ordering tons of beer & Becherovka and I think generally being rude to the poor waiter. The waiter already had on a somewhat silly outfit so I’m sure he wasn’t pleased about their behavior. The restaurant is some kind of medieval-themed place with meat spinning around on sticks over an open fire.

I ordered an appetizer of pork ‘flitch’ and various cheeses. And yes, I ordered it because I had no idea what flitch is, was or could be. My main course was a wood-fire-grilled pork chop. A pork chop wouldn’t usually be my first choice but the Czechs go fucking apeshit for their pork so when in Rome…. Both items arrived at the same time which frankly, I really had no problem with…. I wasn’t expecting to finish everything but I was most curious about this pork flitch mystery. For those who aren’t in the know (as I am now) pork flitch is simply a cured & salted side of bacon. This particular item arrived slices with 3 kinds of cheese (I think Hermelin, something similar to Mozzarella and a mysterious third–probably Eidam). There was no way I was going to eat all that damned pork and cheese WITH my pork main meal. I’m ashamed (or is it a little proud) of what I did next…. this is a total old lady/ghetto thing to do…. I wrapped some pork, cheese and bread in napkins so that I could eat it for breakfast. Pathetic, right?

I walked around some more and went to my teeny tiny room around 9:30. On a sad note I was rather excited that not only did the room have a television but also satellite! Most of the channels were Austrian but I was able to view some programming from the following: MTV Austria, Al-Jazeera, Algeria, Morocco, France, Russia, Germany & even a religious Polish channel. Oh how I miss my DVR and cable!

So Saturday morning arrived and I promptly unwrapped my old lady pork & cheese breakfast. Lame, I know. But here I speak the truth!

The obligatory walk around the castle with requisite photo ops was in order. Additionally, a few stupid self-portraits were on the itinerary. Normally I’m not a fan of looking at photos of myself therefore taking photos of myself is even further down the list. I was feeling frisky yesterday so done and done!

Beer is king in the Czech Republic so the Eggenberg Brewery was next on the agenda. There is a basic tour (with no beer) for 100Kc or for 130Kc you can get the tour plus 2x.5L of the brew. All in all, a good deal! There’s even another tour package that includes as much as you can drink! Yet another reason why I love this country. No way in hell any American brewery would make such an offer. LAWSUIT! COMPENSATION! INJURY! DEATH! Lions and tigers and bears, oh my! I met a few cool people on the tour too; it was a nice break from the monotony of silence! Nevertheless I chose the unfiltered beer and the dark beer. Thumbs up!

Eggenberg is mainly a regional beer that a bit difficult to find in Prague. The tour guide said they do however export to Italy, Russia & I think Finland. Interesting, eh? I had a special Christmas beer that was recommended by a beer-drinking pal and he didn’t steer me wrong; it was tasty and really reasonably priced! So yes, an enjoyable venture.

Other recent stuff: Witches Day & May Day!

Witches day is April 30th…. I really don’t know the details so here are some for you. h Basically, it’s yet another reason to drink. And we did. The evening was spent at Zlute Lazne (also known as ‘the beach’). It’s an outdoor area next to the Vltava that offers sand volleyball, swimming, food, beer, and lots of other stuff. The lines were insanely long and we kept trying to find maybe some ‘secret’ areas or service lines that were shorter. We were not successful. When you stand in line for 45 minutes you tend to buy a lot of beer which makes for an interesting ‘carry’ to your area.

May Day is May 1st…. It’s also a public holiday. Unfortunately, this year it was on a Saturday. May Day is the Czech ‘Labor Day’ as well as some kind of day for lovers & romance. LIke the previous day, we decided that this is another reason to drink. ODS (one of the big political parties) offers some kind of celebration/rally/whatever at Petrin Hill on this day. As part of their ‘subsidized’ festivities one can purchase food and drink for ridiculously cheap prices. Klobasa = 10Kc and also beer was 10Kc. Yes, 10Kc. That’s bout .50 cents. And don’t forget these are half liter beers. Therefore, one usually purchases as much as he/she can carry. I love Ceska Republika!! Aside from the working aspect of the holiday, the romantic thing is actually rather cute. You must kiss your lover (or anyone I suppose) under a blooming cherry tree otherwise you’ll be ‘dry’ for the year. We never did get clarification in exactly what way this translates but use your imagination. I’ll leave you with a quote from Raising Arizona, ‘Her womb was a rocky place where my seed could find no purchase.’

It’s a new year so you shall get a new blog…..

I spent New Year’s Eve in Old Town Square. Fireworks everywhere, tons of people and lots of broken bottles. Quite an experience! Pivo and Becherovka made the rounds. It wasn’t too cold and there was a blue moon eclipse. According to the news articles I read, it was a once in a millennium occurrence so voila! How did you spend your NYE?

Because of the holidays I’ve had little work over the past two weeks so I was able to travel. And travel I did!

Day 1: Christmas

I took an overnight bus to Zagreb, Croatia. Departure 9pm from Florenc metro. Holla! Because of the Schengen Zone there is very little border control between nations in Schengen. As most of Europe is in the SZ, it makes travel easier and little traffic is stopped/inspected upon exit/entry within the zone. Therefore, passport control was only exiting Slovenia and entering Croatia (a non-Schengen country). Entry into Schengen usually gets you a fancy stamp in your passport but going from say France to Germany to Belgium probably won’t add any bright shiny stamps to your travel documents.

Day 2: December 26

The bus arrived an hour early to the main bus station. 7am is mighty early after an uncomfortable night on a bus. Ah yes, the glamorous life of bus travel! I hit the ATM for some local currency and managed to buy a few tram tickets. The main square of Zagreb was only a few blocks away and the hostel I had booked was a few blocks past that.

Check-in at the hostel is noon. What is a girl to do until then?

Croatians are into their coffee. I mean REALLY into their coffee. There are cafes all over the place and they fill up quickly. Living in Prague I’m used to seeing bars on nearly every street corner (if there ISN’T a bar on a block in this town, something is very amiss). Sure, there are pubs in Zagreb but I’d say there are more cafes than bars. Coffee is the thing to do in Croatia–or at least Zagreb. I went to a cafe in the main square and ordered a very expensive coffee. When first using a ‘new’ or unfamiliar currency it’s easy to spend freely as the mental conversion rates never really kick in and you don’t realize the true expense of anything. That said, I ordered an Irish coffee (yes, with alcohol at 9am!) and a chocolate croissant. Upon leaving I was 60Kn lighter (approx. 12 USD). Oy vey!

I continued from the main square and snapped some shots of the main cathedral in town. The sun was shining and the clouds opened up. Considerably nice weather for December! Hooray!

Unfortunately, because of the official holiday of the 26th, many places were closed as was the Dolac market. If you didn’t know, I’m all about some markets. (But I was able to visit the market the following day so I’ll get to that later.)

A main spot for drinking/eating is Tkalciceva ulice. More time to kill still yet so I went there….. more cafes. Oy, these people are caffeine freaks!

I checked into the hostel and I gotta say the ’staff’ guy was a total flake. Although check-in was noon, this guy was clearly unprepared as the first thing he said to me was how he had just woken up and blah blah. The beds weren’t made and the place was a mess. Nice. But hey, expectations should be low for a cheap rate.

In the afternoon I went to the Mirogoj Cemetery. Not only do Croatians love their coffee, they also love their dead people. For real, y’all. Graves & headstones are decorated or ‘upkept’ with good care in this country but the Croatians certainly outdo the Czechs. Perhaps because it was Christmas the locals really did up the graves to the 9s.

On the bus up the hill to the cemetery there was a lovely babuska lady (I don’t know the correct term) with a mustache. A SERIOUS mustache. Although I live in the Czech Republic there are surprisingly few (if any) of the stereotypical babuska ladies here. Not getting the imagery? Think Communist Russian old ladies with their scarves/kerchiefs tied around their heads. Yes, yes, THAT look.

All these dead people made me hungry. Food. Needed it. Where to go? According to my ‘In Your Pocket’ online PDF guide (AWESOME travel resource), there was a local place I wanted to check out for CHEAP EATS. Traveling on a budget sucks but you gotta do it. It was quite a long walk down the main street but alas my sense of direction is usually pretty spot-on so I didn’t have any problems finding the place. I had the lunch special of goulash–delicious! It was served with some freaking delicious bread that I’m still trying to Google to find out what it is so I can make it at home. (Random: I think it’s Pogacha bread so I will be experimenting this weekend!) Since I’m sure many of you travel to Zagreb regularly, you can eat at Zalogajnica “Kod Duje.”

Day 3: December 27

Sunday! Sunday! Sunday! What to do today? The weather on Sunday wasn’t as agreeable as the day before so I decided to hit up a museum. Culture and education! Yay!

The museum didn’t open until 10am so I found and easy-to-find cafe for some java. Moving to Europe really threw the ‘no caffeinated beverages’ thing out the fucking window. This cafe (and I noticed this elsewhere in Croatia) had a little something printed on the menu. It clearly stated the ‘book of complaint’ is at the bar. Yes, book of complaint. I didn’t investigate this further but it’s an interesting idea.

The Mimara Museum is really quite nice. It comprises of works all donated by one wealthy collector. It’s an art museum so I don’t know what else to say. Sculptures, paintings, Christian artifacts. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

I headed back towards the main square because I wanted to hit up the Dolac Market today. In true form (as Judie’s offspring), I enjoy going to markets and discovering new and funky foods. Add in the new country/Euro factor and it’s even better. In the lower part of the Dolac market there were many vendors selling all kinds of meats, cheeses and breads. Additionally, there were even a few stalls with ladies selling these giant fresh sheets of pasta. The meat shops had all kind of funky cuts of meat as well as proudly displaying the carcasses of pigs about their stalls. Dead pig heads = awesomeness. In the back of the market were the cabbage ladies. The entire back half of the food hall smells of the soured cabbage-y mixture that sits in big buckets waiting to be purchased. It’s one of those smells that certainly ‘wafts.’

For lunch I found a place on Tkalciceva that was open. Before my main meal I ordered some Trappist cheese and bread. Those Trappist monks are busy guys: beer, chocolate and cheese. It was also served with that freaking delicious bread again. Man, I have GOT to make this stuff pronto. If the supermarket was open now I’d go buy supplies immediately. As a main meal I ordered the cevapcici. Cevapcici is one of many national dishes. It’s basically finger-length hand-rolled sausages. Really good! This particular meal was served with raw white onion and a Croatian condiment called ajvar which is a paste made from red peppers and eggplant. I imaged you could slather this stuff on a dirty shoe and it would be good. It’s that kind of thing.

Dinner was at Nocturno–a place recommended by the flaky American guy from the hostel. Reasonably priced food is always a plus. Croatia is known for their beaches (tons of Europeans flock to them in the summer months). So, if a country has a lot of beaches, there’s probably going to be a lot of seafood as the cuisine. Although I wasn’t on the coast, I wanted some fairly fresh fish for dinner. Grilled calamari stuffed with ham & cheese is delicious!

Palacinky (sorry, that’s the Czech word for this item–I don’t know the Croatian one) was my dessert. Sometimes a girl wants her chocolate! Anyway, palacinky are basically crepes. They’re easy to find in this part of the world and I can confirm that they are delicious. I had the chocolate variety.

Day 4: December 28

While checking out of the hostel, the flaky American didn’t remember me paying him two days before. Nice. Vince from L.A. is an aspiring rapper (yes, really) and he informed me that he has mad skillz, yo. At this particular hostel there is a ‘key deposit’ but once you check-out and return the locker keys, you naturally get your deposit back. Well, idiot Vince the shitty rapper asked me who I paid and I had to remind him that it was him. He had told me the previous day that since gambling is legal in Croatia (as it is here, too) he got into some money problems and was broke until Jan. 7 when he got paid. He then proceeded to tell me how my ‘key deposit’ was the only money he had until that time. Babe, I wasn’t born yesterday and I’m not pitying you and your West Coast Broke-Ass Rapping Self and I’m not giving you my deposit. I work for a living and am actually required to be responsible. They’re good attributes to have. Yeah, it sucks that the dude has no money but he’s not my responsibility. Get it together, dude. So, as I was leaving in the morning and he was digging through his stuff for cash (I don’t understand how this $ somehow became ‘his’ during this process but I didn’t ask), he then again emphasized how he had literally no money. At all. Needless to say, I took my money back and let him beg in his pathetic way to the next traveler to come through. End rant.

I decided to do an on-the-fly trip to Budapest. Why not, right? I had some extra money and the time off work so I said fuck it, I’m going. There was a 10am train so no worries. A ticket was purchased. I had some time to kill–I wanted breakfast. Ah ha! How about another national dish? Breakfast was a juice from a vending machine and burek bought from a little bakery inside the train station. I suppose you could say burek is pie-shaped but it’s not a pie in the traditional sense that you or I would consider a pie. It’s a round layered dough creation either made with meat or cheese. Mine was the cheese one.

The train to Budapest was a bit long and boring. Train travel is super easy and accessible in Europe; I don’t get why Americans don’t utilize it more often. We’re lazy gas-guzzling automobile whores. Anyway, Lake Balaton (Hungary) is quite huge and the train followed the lake parallel for the length of the lake. It appears to be a resort area of Hungary as most of the towns/villages on the lake were ‘closed up’ for the winter.

Upon arrival at Keleti station I changed over my money to Hungarian Forints and I was off to find a hostel I had Googled the night before. Because this was an unplanned extra trip, I didn’t have any physical maps to use as a guide nor did I have any real ‘tourist’ information so navigating my way from the train station to a downtown hostel could have been interesting. I bought two tickets for the bus/metro/tram from a newsstand inside the train station and I hoped I could find a bus or tram that would take me where I needed to go. A bus stop around the side of the building listed the stop I needed so on the bus I went. The Budapest public transit is heavily policed. (Way more than here in Prague.) A guy in unofficial-looking attire promptly pulled out his metro cop identification and began checking that passengers had the appropriate tickets.

I found the hostel I had researched (although I had not made a reservation) with relative ease and I can proudly state I didn’t get lost. Not bad work for someone in a foreign country with no knowledge of the language and no map or other information to use as a guide. The Goat Hostel (great name) gets a huge thumbs up from me. The place was really quite nice and I had a room to myself! Although I was paying for a ‘dorm’ type room, I was lucky to have it to myself. Ahhhh… The staff was super friendly and they’re going to get a glowing review from me on Hostelworld.com

Being a good Hungarian girl, I had a food objective that night: real legit paprikas. My Mom and Grandma have made this stuff for years (and it’s always been one of my favorites) but I wanted an authentic experience. Because I had inquired about a close place to eat dinner, the girl on staff directed me to a place down the street. The For Sale Pub served out a giant heap of veal paprikas. It wasn’t cheap but when in Budapest…..

You might be wondering….what is paprikas? It’s basically considered a ’stew’ but it’s not exactly something your slurp with a spoon. First, some dumplings are made–there are several varieties of dumplings in Europe. Here in the C.R. there are flour and potato dumplings. But these dumplings are made into a big ‘loaf’ and sliced off individually and served with meals. The Hungarian (and Croatian version from what I could tell) dumplings are the flour variety but they are much smaller and ‘individualized’ rather than made from a big loaf-like object. On top of the dumplings goes the meat/stew mixture. I suppose various meats can be used but my Mom only ever made a chicken version. Anyway, it’s a paprika-y/onion-y/red pepper-y thick reddish base with chicken (or misc. meat) and topped with sour cream. Trust me when I say this dish is freaking delicious. One of my all-time favorites. You will always win points with homemade dumplings.

The atmosphere of The For Sale Pub was actually pretty cool. Imagine a woody rural pub or lodge–that’s what the interior looked like. The floorboards were uneven (intentionally so) and there was actual hay on the floor. Small pieces of paper were tacked all over the walls (various notes from former patrons) which really kind of add to the overall feel of the place. It wasn’t the cheapest way I could have eaten dinner but I had little time and this was the homeland!

At this point I’ll mention that Budapest is fucking beautiful. I’m so going back. Seeing all the big fantastic buildings illuminated at night was a great first experience.

Day 5: December 29

Free breakfast at the hostel! I got a room to myself and they offer to feed me–most excellent!

I only had a few hours before getting a train back to Prague so today was going to be a quick one. From the hostel I walked down a main touristy street that has lots of souvenir shops and miscellaneous cafes & restaurants. As is per the norm with souvenir shops, everything was overpriced and in some of the shops the sales assistants were pushy and a bit aggressive. I’m not a fan of that tactic; it doesn’t work for this girl.

If you have ever seen a photo of Budapest it’s most certainly been of either the Chain Bridge or Buda Castle. Because the Buda part of Budapest is on a hill, it makes the sights that much more impressive. The castle sits above the city and when it’s lit up at night, it’s pretty awesome. There’s also the Matthias Church and the Fisherman’s Bastion that round out the impressive landscape. I walked across the Chain Bridge and took a funicular up to the castle. Frankly, my ass and legs were killing me from the crazy walking I had been doing and I was not interested in going up a steep hill. Sure, it would have been a healthier choice (and free) but it just wasn’t happening. Obligatory photos were snapped outside the castle and I walked over to Matthias Church and Fisherman’s Bastion. The FB has great views of the city, by the way!

Back down (on foot this time) and back across the Chain Bridge. St. Stephen’s Cathedral is just on the other side of the bridge so I got a bit of my Jesus on while in Budapest. I passed through the Christmas markets and smelled all the wonderful food. Ahh yes, food! There were many kinds of sausages & mixed meat/veggie combos none of which I know the names too. There were also large knuckles or joints of various animals all cooked up and brown and crispy-looking. Sorry vegetarians, that shit is good, yo. There’s something just so wrong and so right about seeing miscellaneous meat cooking on the street. God bless the animals that feed us! There were also lots of handmade crafty items for sale such as traditional Hungarian clothing, ceramics, hats, tablecloths, etc. I couldn’t justify getting more money from the ATM to buy said stuff so I skimped out and only bought something for my 95-year-old Hungarian grandmother.

 

Back at the train station I had a ticket for the 3:28 back to Prague. I arrived home around midnight and I took my ass to bed.

Today: I wrote this blog yesterday but I managed to find a recipe for the Croatian bread mentioned early in my post.

I had to go there with the lame title. It’s Halloween!

It’s been a productive day thus far. Many people like to be lazy on Saturdays. I like to get shit done. That’s how I roll. Up at 730, two loads of laundry done by 9, shopping at the mall and the supermarket done by 1030. Cooked lunch and having a glass of wine by 130. Good times.

Whole roaster chickens were on sale (AKCE! One of my favorite Czech words) at Albert today so I had to buy one. Roasted chicken is one of my favorite foods and roast chicken skin? Sweet Mother of God–it’s my crack. I knew I wanted to make a chicken salad today so I threw some random things together. Here’s what I did…..

Mix olive oil, fresh lemon juice, salt, pepper, marjoram, rosemary & oregano in a bowl. Rub it all over the bird. Stuff the bird with a cut up onion and an apple. Cook your bird and baste periodically.

I like cucumber and tomatoes so I used those today. Chop to the desired size. I also had an extra onion left so I decided to use that. Since raw onion isn’t one of the greatest things to me, I sauteed it in some olive oil and salt. After the onion started to brown, I added a chopped clove of garlic and a splash of red wine.

Assemble the salad and dress with your favorite dressing. Since I’m an American living in Europe, I used Hidden Valley Ranch. Trust me, it’s a gold mine here as Ranch is unavailable. I have my Mom to thank for shipping me goodies.

Pour yourself a glass of wine and bon appetit!

Here are some random pictures for your viewing pleasure!

The above were taken at the Wine & Cheese Festival in Old Town Square. Ironically, we only saw one place that was selling a few spices and there was no wine to be found anywhere. Boo!

RelfBowl ‘09: Letna Park–Go Big or Go Home

Kutna Hora, Czech Republic

The Sedlec Ossuary–everyone knows about the bone church! Wikipedia says it’s made with 40-70k skeletons.

Wine. It’s good for you.

It’s made from fruit.

Saturday September 19

Wine has quite a history throughout the world and here in the C.R., it’s no different. Every year in the late summer/early fall there are harvest festivals. These festivals are for a specific kind of wine called burcak. It’s young wine that is also fermented. It doesn’t taste like any wine you’ve had before. It’s available in both the red and white varieties.

2pm

So, cut to last weekend I went out with a bunch of people to the local burcak festival (there were actually several all over town that weekend) at Havlickovy Sady (a city park). The even at the park was really quite cool. Aside from tons of people, there was a big main stage as well as various tents/vendors for drinks, food & miscellaneous knick-knacks. The theme of the festival was some kind of 19thC. thing. I don’t know how to describe it other than saying many people were wearing period costume. There was also even the old-fashioned giant bikes; you know the ones with the huge front wheel and the teeny back wheel. To the side of the main stage was also a performance area (we happened to be sitting to the immediate right of it) where several Cirque du Soleil-type acrobatic performers did cool stuff throughout the day.

8 or 9pm

After the events at Havlickovy Sady, we headed over to Jiriho z Podebrad. There were yet more tents with more alcohol as well as several bands playing.

10 or 11pm

Off to Riegrovy Sady beer garden. Oy, the events get hazy at this point. Good times. I can report that some random drunk passed out guy was sitting across from me and the new TEFL kids decided to fuck with him so I snapped all kinds of hilarity.

1 or 2am

Next stop a bar in Vinohrady. Wow, I’m too old to do this power drinking. Yikes. I need to go home. But not until I finish my requisite pivo!

230am

After midnight the metro stops running and the trams change routes, numbers and times. I walked home. Most excellent. It’s good for circulation. That’s what I kept telling myself……’it’s for health….it’s for health!’

The verdict?Burcak is mighty tasty stuff.

*Burcak is sold in various quantities: ,33l ,5l 1.5l or 2lAlthough it looks a bit ghetto to be carrying around a 1.5 or 2l plastic container of wine, everyone does it. It’s in the pictures. You shall see.

Friday September 25

Another Friday night at Riegrovy Sady beer garden. It was rather chilly that night at not many people were out drinking. But perhaps that’s because it’s a three day weekend. I write this at 830 on Monday morning when I would normally be getting ready for work. Woo hoo for holidays! Nobody knows what the holiday actually IS today but we don’t care; it just gives us all another day off.

After Riegrovy we went to Akropolis. This is some random club/restaurant/bar in Zizkov. I’m normally opposed to paying a cover charge but this place was a paltry 30Kc. Oh well. I bit the bullet and did it. From what I saw the place wasn’t that fantastic. Although it looked quite large and also looked to be another one of those ‘how-many-rooms-in-the-basement-of-this-building-are-there’ kind of places. We ended up there with a friend of Sean Hardy’s who is hardcore French and introduces himself as (seriously), ‘Hello I am Freddy and I am ready.’ With the super thick Frenchie accent it’s even more hilarious than it reads.

Saturday September 26

I got a text message from Natalie and Jack saying they were going to Karlstejn Castle that day. Sweet! I hadn’t been there yet so I was game.

The Round-trip train ticket is only 109Kc so why not, right? We got on the 12:41 and headed out.

Tons of people got off at the same stop and we just figured that they all had the same idea as we did for a Saturday afternoon. Karlstejn is probably the closest castle to Prague that isn’t IN Prague so it’s quite a popular day-trip. Anyway, we soon realized that all these people were going to Karlstejn because of the annual burcak festival!! Sweet! I love this fucking country. We hadn’t planned on this extra bonus event! We were stoked.

Karlstejn is a really cute little town just W/SW of the city. It’s a good 2mi. trek up the castle but it’s right up the main street of the town so it’s by no means a difficult walk. Along the sides of the road were of course burcak vendors as well as lots of local trinkets, etc. Additionally, there was this big medieval theme going on, too. The castle was built in 1348 so there were tons of people dressed in period costume, etc. From the program information we read that at 230pm there was to be the ‘royal procession’ to the castle gates and then after there would be various performances inside the castle. Oh excellent!!! We made it up the hill to the gate and waited for the procession. I’d say there were a good 150-200 people involved in the procession. There did not mess around. Once inside the castle there was music, bellydancers & faqir as well as a court jeser/juggler/comic who the kids loved. Pretty cool stuff!

Along the way we guzzled a few beers and purchased a nice huge 1.5l of red burcak. The previous week I only had the white burcak and my personal rating of the red is higher than the white. I was told burcak tastes like cider or juice and I didn’t think the white tasted like either. Both versions have an obvious smell of fermentation and both are bubbly. (Actually, bottles of the stuff can explode from the bubbles. I nearly had the remaining red I have explode all over my yellow walls last night. I avoided disaster with my ninja-like skills.) The red burcak actually DOES taste more like ‘juice’ than anything and I can understand why it’s so easy to drink massive amounts of the stuff. Danger Will Robinson, danger!

We got on the 636pm train back to Prague and I was home by 8pm. All in all a fantastic start to a three-day weekend!

Sunday September 27

Since the day before we did a spontaneous trip to Karlstejn I was feeling the urge to do more. I consulted some online resources and travel books and waffled back and forth between Melnik, Krivoklat Castle, Kutna Hora & maybe Tabor. In the end, I decided on Tabor. Tabor is a town in Southern Bohemia. I had some friends go the day before and I got the thumbs up that it was a good trip so I went by myself.

I made it to the train station at noon and bought my ticket for 241Kc. The train departed on time (as everything does in this country) and I was off. The train was a (not really) nice old Communist-era clunker. It was old and rusty and had plenty of graffiti.

Arrival in Tabor was at about 2 and I made my way into the ‘old town’ area. Although I had no map, I’m usually quite good with directions (despite my possession of a vagina) and can make my way around places fairly easily. Along the way, I made the correct judgment calls and I found the old square with no problems. The main square of Tabor is really cute. I know centuries old cities shouldn’t be referred to as ‘cute’ but I’m a female, so it fits. Around the square are cool old buildings as well as a clock tower and an old church with an even bigger tower. I hiked up the church tower for 25Kc and it has a freaking fantastic view of the town. The walk up the tower is interesting. Up old stone steps and then to rickety wooden stairs that are quite steep. The rope ‘railing’ looks questionable but it seems to work. Additionally, I’ll note that you have to bend way down and walk UNDER the giant church bell to continue to the top. Ha ha nice! My Nikon was happy once I got to the top.

Back down in town I continued to walk around for a few hours and have a few beers. I even managed to get a Wi-Fi signal at a restaurant so I started Facebooking. A girl has gotta have her priorities. For those interested, I had garlic soup (oh yeah, good stuff) and roast pork knee on toast with cheese (also yummy). The main beverage in town is Budvar (where American Budweiser gets the name) but this is the ‘original’ stuff and people get pissed if one assumes the Czech and American versions are the same. Budvar is made in Ceske Budejovice which is a bit more south than Tabor. Ask the Google.

I decided to get on the 7pm train back to Prague and I was home by 9pm. Another good day!

Monday September 28

The last day of my long weekend. Did I stay in? Nope. BBQ, baby. It was the ‘Goodbye to Summer’ BBQ so there were many men grilling the meat while we woman foraged for berries and tend the fire. Ha, no not really. But something like that.

A GREAT WEEKEND!I’m going to post a bunch of photos to Facebook rather than here. Photos can only be loaded individually here and they also need to be resized. I want to share a lot of them so it would take a lot of time on my end to do these things. A mass upload on FB is in order. Stay tuned.

I love the SAPA market I really do.

It’s horribly cliche to say a place is alive, to say that it has a pulse. But I swear SAPA has a heartbeat. Granted, it’s a heartbeat spoken in a different tongue but alas, it’s there.

The workers are constantly unpacking huge boxes of wares and organizing their little shops. Some of the people listen to music while others play cards. Others even play some kind of game where money is exchanged and even yet another strange table game that looks to be a cross of chinese checkers, chess and dominos. They drink their tea and they laugh and conduct their business and go upon their merry way. Meanwhile I walk about with mouth gaped like the out-of-place ‘tourist’ who is amazed at it all. I’ve been to SAPA enough times now so that I know the little alleyways and where the hidden spots are located. But, that doesn’t keep me from cruising them all. The SAPA market is a city within a city. It’s a community with lawyers and schools and even an insurance agency. I love it!

I made an unplanned trip to SAPA this morning because it was still early and I was in that part of town so off I went. It was a quick trip today as I didn’t do much browsing but I certainly wanted a steaming bowl of Pho. I know I’ve blogged about this before but I’ll recap….. With relative confidence I can say Pho is the Vietnamese national dish. In short, it’s a big bowl of piping hot broth with noodles. No, it doesn’t sound very interesting but trust me when I say it’s freaking delicious. The broth is super flavorful and that alone would be good enough for me. But then there’s all the extra fabulous stuff they throw in the mix. Aside from the broth, noodles & meat there is a combination of onions & misc. fresh ‘greenery’ that is added last minute so as to retain it’s bright color and freshness. Additionally, it’s up to the consumer of said bowl of goodies as to what extras he or she would like to add. I usually opt for them all: freshly cut lemon, fresh sliced red chilies, sliced garlic, chili/garlic paste & of course Sriacha. Sriacha is a fiery red sauce that while being fairly ‘hot’ on the scale of heat, it’s not so hot that you can’t taste any other ingredients in what you are eating. I seem to be able to handle hotter foods than I think I can therefore I always end up gradually adding more Sriacha. The stuff will make you sweat a bit but sweat in a good way. I found myself blowing my nose this morning and it’s August. A bowl of chicken & pork Pho with a .5L of Pilsner Urquell - 110Kc. All in all, a most excellent price. Now go eat your Pho!

Update on yesterday’s post: I’m recording the voiceover for this documentary tomorrow. The demo/audition/whatever was super brief this a.m. I met a guy at 10am at a recording studio and I read 2 bits of script while he recorded. One take–nice & easy. I’m not even sure how much of a script I’m scheduled to do but it pays well and will be an interesting experience. Keep your eyes and ears peeled for a short documentary on scuba diving & photography in Mauritius!! Hmm, wonder if I can bag an entry on IMDB out of this. Something to chew on.

Ok, since Prague is known for the sex industry and attractive people, I thought I’d add my two cents.

Aside from the Brazilians who have a lock on the ‘hot babe’ market (e.g. Victoria’s Secret), Czech women are also known all over the world as being uber-babes. They’re usually tall & leggy and have a name ending in -ova. Gender aside though, I’ll confirm there are some really good looking people here. No, I don’t get surrounded on my morning metro commute by flocks of underwear models on their way to being greased up for a photo shoot. These infamous hot people don’t travel in packs and contrary to the research, their naturally-occuring population isn’t as high as many think. The streets are not littered with gruff and sexy dudes in leather while smoking unfiltered cigarettes. These guys aren’t just resting on the side of the street leaning against their expensive Italian cars. Nope, not reality. Similarly, the porno/underwear models don’t gleefully skip down the street with their skirts blowing in the breeze. I will say though that there does seem to be an abnormally high percentage of tall women here. We’re talking six footers. Lots of them. Strange. And being a person of ‘average stature,’ I tend to notice these things as it makes me feel even shorter. Boo. But anyway, there are certainly a fair number of really beautiful people in this country. They aren’t everywhere all the time. You need to find them in their natural habitat. Hmm, where is that, you ask? Well, as most people know, the good-looking tend to flock with the equally attractive and those types like to go to bars and clubs. They like to be seen wearing their hot new outfits; plus, I’m pretty sure it’s some kind of Czech mating ritual that these people are practicing. The few clubs I’ve been to have certainly had a fair share of Euro babes and Euro dudes on the dancefloor.

All that said, there are plenty of average and um, below-average looking people here. Here’s a good example of a rather homely gentleman I encountered while I was on the bus back to the SAPA market a few weeks ago. First, riding a bus standing up is very difficult. Brace yourself properly and stand parallel with the bus for the best traction. That’s my free tip for the day. So, I’m standing there pretty much right in front of the middle door when an older man got on the bus and stood in front of me. Like a good chap he turned and faced outward so at least he could get off at his stop with some speed. But, while he was standing in my direct line of sight (and also about 18 inches from my face) I could do nothing but stare. Stare at what? Well, when he boarded the bus I had a visceral reaction. Why? This man looks like Nosferatu. Don’t know who he is? Here ya go. This is not an exaggeration. His ears were gigantic and saggy and his nose was large and slightly curled. But, the horrible part happened when he turned away from me. From the back of his head there was a growth. A big one. Medically speaking I cannot begin to guess what the fuck that thing is but I would liken it to a wart. It was definitely some kind of fleshy protuberance. It was so big it had grown past his hair. ACK!

So basically my point is that your average day here will be peppered with some hot people swimming backstroke in a humdrum sea of genetic mediocrity. Going further into the peppering of hot, I’ll say there were a few interesting employees at Tesco this afternoon. (Sidenote: Tesco is bascially the European Wal-Mart. Since it’s NOT the REAL Wal-Mart, I have allowed myself to shop there. Tesco is generally quite cheap and I bought some homeless guy wine today. Why homeless guy wine? Well, it was 15.90Kc–yes, less than ONE DOLLAR U.S.– and it’s in a box. Yes, I took a photo!) So, I took the metro out to Zlicin (end of the yellow line–look for the stop from a previous Prague Metro link) because there’s a huge IKEA and Tesco that way. In Tesco, I was walking around with my basket buying random (and generally unnecessary) items when I came across a girl wearing red. The store had this chick manning a table/station in the liquor department of the store. I think she was pimping the Tesco credit card. Anyway, she was a good looking girl and tall and wearing kind of a ridiculous dress. I’d call that shade of red as fuck me red and her dress was short. Really short. Then near the entrance was another girl in an equally short skirt working her angle there. Bascially, these perfectly good-looking women were trying to sell Tesco credit cards and they looked like strippers.

My new favorite thing to do….and it’s free! Prague has a really awesome public transportation system. No, really. The metro, tram, and bus lines are very integrated and extremely efficient. Navigating through this city is super easy and unless you are brain-dead, reading the tram and bus schedules is a breeze. It’s almost impossible to get lost here. As far as the metro is concerned, there are only 3 transfer stations so that makes it a breeze. I live smack in the middle of town so getting to work is painless as I am so centrally located. My metro stop is on the yellow line but I can be on the green or red lines within five minutes. It’s pretty awesome. So anyway, back to my new favorite thing to do. Since I have a 3 month all-access metro pass, I can ride where and when I like with no restrictions on frequency. That said, I like just getting on a tram or bus and riding around. I’ve done this for the past three weekends and it’s a great and painless (FREE!) way to see different areas of town. Prague is really quite spread out and there is great diversity not only in the architecture but also economics. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out where the ‘good’ and ‘bad’ parts of town are located. I feel obligated to qualify my ‘bad’ parts of town statement. Yes, knowing where the rich and poor live is obvious however, when I say bad I don’t mean crime-ridden or super dangerous. Overall, Prague is a very safe city and I’ve never felt in danger or freaked out traveling alone. I’m not usually one to freak out anyway but generally speaking, the main issue here is with pick pocketing and that’s (for the most part) a non-violent act.

I took some photos last weekend and I really wanted to upload a slideshow but somehow it doesn’t seem to want to upload. A one click upload would be a hell of a lot easier than uploading individuals here.Click for bigger!

Well, I had intended on getting out of town this weekend as it’s a holiday and I have a 4-day weekend. I’m still trying to figure out why Easter is on Monday but I’m not going to lodge a formal complain with the government requesting that I be permitted to work on a scheduled holiday. Oh, well. And also since I don’t have anything scheduled for Fridays, I thought this would be a great chance to get out of Prague. 

Prague is great and beautiful and awesome (certainly now since the sun is here) but I haven’t left the city yet and I’d like to get out of Dodge for a bit. I had heard about a great travel agency that sells super cheap tickets to Budapest but since they ARE cheap, everyone uses this firm. As such, I tried to book a reservation too late and the only availability conflicted with my work schedule so my hopes of going to Hungary were dashed. Fear not loyal readers, I’ll get there soon. Maybe next weekend. Transportation tickets AND 2 nights in a hostel could theoretically run me about 80$ USD.In case you weren’t aware, that’s fucking awesome.

So, since I’m stuck in town this weekend, I decided to max out my newly purchased 3 month metro pass and ride my ass off. (Too bad I can’t do that literally.)  Off we go!

Day one….Yesterday, I finally made it to Vysehrad. Vysehrad is an old walled castle complex (although there is no castle) just south of the middle of town. There is also a cool cemetery and an old church. Prague has shitload of old churches. St. Vitus is still the most impressive but they’re all far cooler than anything you can see in the U.S. save for the National Cathedral in D.C..

Prague is a city of hills. As such, Vysehrad is on one of these hills and it’s next to the river. The complex has killer views of town and you can see everything. It was a gorgeous clear day yesterday so it was perfect. The flowering trees are now in bloom and some flowers are starting to appear so the grounds of Vysehrad are really quite pretty and serene. There wasn’t nearly the amount of foot traffic there as is at Prague Castle so it’s perhaps a bit more do-able for anyone who has an aversion to crowds. Note to self: this would be a great place to bring some food and beer when M&D come in June. Cheap lunch at a ‘pretty place’ will be right up their alley.

After Vysehrad I decided to go back to the SAPA market in Prague 4. Again, the weather was much better than the previous visit so that was a bonus. I went into a random small cafe/restaurant and ordered a bowl of Pho. Unlike the Pho I had in the Vietnamese market in Prague 10, this one was with chicken. Don’t quote me on this but I’m fairly sure the it’s traditionally made with beef.  It’s all good because it was a paltry 80Kc. Hooray for cheap!

After the market I stopped by Glossa to do a few things in the resource room. Hooray for work! Oh, and I finally started working this past week. I can happily report all of my students are super cool and very nice people. Czechs have a reputation for being surly and standoffish but of all the people I’ve met, they are not this way. They might not be initally very chatty with ‘filler’ conversation but they are more than willing to talk. I’ve had no problems with students not wanting to talk or participate in planned lessons. Maybe I’ve just had a good week but I’d like to think that either a) they’re just super cool or b) I’m that fucking awesome.

I sent out a message to Keith (my teaching partner in TEFL) and a fellow beer lover so we went and had a few beers at a pub in Nusle. We met up at U Klokočnika and drank some super hard to find Kacov brew. Good times. And cheap. Karl and Dita came for a few as well and somehow I ended up going with K & D to Malostranska to listen to some dude’s band. Funny how random an evening can become. I went out at 4 p.m. for a few beers and got home at 2 a.m. I am a freaking rock star. We sat with other people that knew the lead singer (who happens to be a friend of Dita’s) and I learned some dirty Czech phrases from a cool Czech girl who was more than eager to teach me the local versions of fuck off, I am drunk, don’t shit on me, I’d like to take a piss, etc. I was a good student though, I took notes. Ha.

Day two…..Thankfully, due to my new schedule, I’m no used to getting up early so I was up at 8am on a Saturday. Boo. Day two of my 4 day weekend was a day at Bohemia Bagel and the Prague Zoo. Aside from the usual Gothic/historical stuff to see here, I’d highly suggest checking out the Prague Zoo. The place is enormous and they have everything. It’s really quite scene and pretty and constructed on and around a huge hill. Of course since it was Saturday it was family day and there were plenty of cute kids running around (or being towed in the zoo’s wagons) by tired parents. And even though I’m childless, the zoo kicked my ass, too. Three hours of hiking up and down hills is tiring on an old broad. Good thing I don’t have bunyons or a hump in my back.

This evening I  walked around my neighborhood and hopped a random tram to Prague Castle. The castle gardens opened for the season today. I went at about 6 or so and it was perfect. Although St. Vitus was already closed (or in the middle of a service), the complex was rather deserted and the light from the setting sun gave everything a really beautiful yellow glow. Ack, I should have brought my camera!

So tomorrow is day three of the weekend and I’m not quite sure where to go. It needs to be cheap or free. Hmm.</p> <p>Oh and the party in THE NATURE last week? Yeah, it was great. Open bar at a cool hotel/restaurant in the woods. These half liter beers can be killer if you drink 600 of them. Aye aye aye! Check for photos on Facebook. Due to my rather inebriated state,  I was clearly incapable of getting up to see Obama speak on Sunday. I’m a bit pissed at myself for that as it really was my intention to go. I give myself a big thumbs down!

I have plenty of photos from my adventures but I need to upload them all and do some editing. They will be posted soon so stay tuned.  

It’s been 10ish days since the last blog and while I don’t have anything really exciting to report I can say that I landed a 3rd job. Although none of these jobs have started yet (yawn!), at least I’ll be working soon (Monday!!!) and will begin generating an income. While not working is great, it’s just a bit boring as I have no television and funds are limited. Boo on both fronts.

MEDIA Not having a television sucks. It does. I’m a tv girl. I miss my shows. I’d even take a CSI: Miami marathon right now and David Caruso is the biggest douchebag on American television. Damn. My time away is making me crave the Horatio. WTF? When discussing my tv woes with one of my flatmates (the one that actually speaks), she told me she found a movie website. Great, awesome, sweet! Ok, of course there are about a bajillion movie websites with free streaming feeds. The problem is that most of these feeds link to Megavideo. Megavideo is fine if you don’t mind watching something for 72 minutes or less. Apparently, the higher ups at Megavideo decided 72 minutes is the magical cut-off. At that time, you can either pony up some cash and get a ‘real’ account or you can ‘wait’ 54 minutes and continue watching. Problem with waiting is that well, it’s WAITING and the stream doesn’t keep your ‘place’ so you have to wait MORE through any buffering issues. Boring. Yawn. I don’t like that option. I’m sure there’s some techie issue that could get me around this problem but I don’t know what that is so….. anyway, since finding this ‘new’ site, I’ve been a movie whore for the last 4 days. My tally is up to 10 or so and that’s just sad. That said, here’s a few movie recommendations: Dead Snow (see below), Hamlet 2, Pineapple Express, Let the Right One In, Step Brothers, Winged Creatures, 3:10 to Yuma…..

ZOMBIES I was at Marks & Spencer yesterday at Palladium and the cashier guy looked like a real-live zombie. Yes, zombie. This dude was tall & lanky, super pale with sunken and reddened eyes and goofy ears that grew away from his head. Zombie was the first thing in my head when I saw poor Jaromir. He could be a perfectly nice man; this is something I will never know. But, perhaps since I’m fresh off the Norwegian horror flick ‘Dead Snow’ (with Nazi zombies–yes, really and it was fucking awesome), I think he looks more like a zombie than an average person who doesn’t watch such cinema.

DRUGS While I was walking away from Skrivanek (one of my employers) the other day, I saw a guy examining the crack rock he had just purchased. Apparently the drug laws (or enforcement of said laws) are quite lax here so thus the crack inspection. Good times. At least he’s monitoring his purchase before he fires up. I still haven’t seen the kids shooting up in the park behind the National Museum. Sad but true. I want to have an HBO Undercover experience.

MEAT I found some Czech-style bologna the other day. Bologna is fucking delicious. Sorry vegetarians, it is. Eat it. Now. My general Czech vocabulary hasn’t improved any so I’m still kind of shopping for things at random. When I was in the deli meat section, I decided I wanted a sandwich. My American friends know good and well that I heart my sandwiches. It’s true. I cannot deny this love. Bread + meat + cheese = Awesomeness! Anyway, this bologna is delicious. It’s flecked with fat which, in my book, makes a damn fine meal. Nobody ever really wants to admit it but fat is what makes meat taste so bloody good. It’s true. Look it up.

WHEN YA GOTTA GO, YA GOTTA GO A few weeks ago on the tram we passed along a gentleman in the street helping his son with a rather intimate activity. Clearly the kid had to take a leak and rather than go use a public facility, Daddy leaned over Junior and assisted in the peeing process. Into the street grate it went. Really. While walking to the Glossa office today, I noticed the second occurrence of said pee assistance. Different parent and different kid but yep, Momma had her hands on the cocktail weenie while the golden stream flowed down into the sewers of Prague. I really had to laugh as I was assuming the first instance was just some freak thing I’d never see again but I was proven wrong today. Now, my assumption is different. Perhaps during the hot summer months the streets will be filled with parents and peeing kids. There’s already enough dog shit on the sidewalks in this town, do I now have to dance and tippie-toe thus evading the kiddie urine?

EASTER BUNNY The annual Easter Festival is all over town for nearly a month. I don’t know exactly what this entails but there are food vendors set up in several spots around town selling miscellaneous meats and pastry items as well as the obligatory Czech beer. There also seem to be lots of painted eggs and children’s toys. Good times.

OBAMA IN THE HIZZY Obama is going to be here this weekend. I admit, this is a bit exciting and I should go. I want to go. But….. standing around in one spot all day does not appeal in any way.

Upon further inspection I’m happy to report that the security detail will not be permitting ammo or explosives. Phew. I was worried for a minute. Also, please note that ’structures’ are prohibited. I love the vagueness of structure prohibition. To clarify, exactly what qualifies as a ’structure?’ Is this something I’m affixing to the cobbled walk around the speaking platform or would say an inflatable yard pool fall under the descriptor of structure? I need additional support on this otherwise I’ll have to ditch my lesson plan for a newer and streamlined one.

BOOZE Wine. Let’s talk about this. Usually, I’m not a big wine person. Not that I don’t like it because I do and it can be great. However, I typically go the route of pivo and certainly now that I’m in a beer-consuming and producing culture. That said, I did make a few purchases at Albert last week. A good portion of the wine here is inexpensie. We’re talking less than 200Kc here (10USD) and that’s if you are springing for some ‘good stuff.’ My knowledge of European wine is for shit and the Eastern European varieties are completely lost on me. So, since I was in a wine kind of mood I bought a bottle of some stuff from Bulgaria. Yeah, Bulgaria. I didn’t know that made wine either. But hell, just about every place on earth produces or bottles their own wine so the Bulgarian factor really shouldn’t be so surprising. A big 49Kc is what I paid for that stuff. Go ahead & get your currency converter. I’ll wait. Like I said…it’s um, ‘inexpensive.’ Cut to two nights later and I was back at Albert. I’m not lying when I say I found something cheaper. Yes, cheaper than 49Kc. Behold the special selection for Albert (note the store logo on the back label!)–sold for the low, low price of 39Kc. And yes, I DID drink it as is evident by the photo. At such a ridiculous price, how could I NOT consume it?

SAPA MARKET The SAPA market is in Prague 4. In my last blog I detailed my trip to the Vietnamese market in Prague 10. I have since been to the market in Praha 4. The SAPA market is huge. Fucking gigantic. We’re talking a small city here. For realz. Yet another adventure involving a metro and then a bus. Geographically, SAPA isn’t that far away but I was really channeling Bourdain on that visit. I’ve never been to Asia but holy crap, it felt like Vietnam.

The retail halls at SAPA are huge. Several buildings with criss-crossed aisles again selling tons of clothes, purses, toys, etc. There is also quite a bit more ethnic food variety at SAPA as there are several independent markets selling odd-looking items. Of the shops I visited, there was/is a rather interesting looking item behind the glass in the meat counter. It’s a big plastic bowl of various (raw) cuts of meats and organs with raw egg yolks swimming around in the multi-colored flesh. I was curious to know what the stuff is but seeing as I how I cannot communicate in Czech or Vietnamese, I didn’t bother asking. Anyone?

One of the restaurants had a guy blow-torching some kind of meat on the sidewalk. Dude was blow torching like it was a lab experiment. The whole effect looked cool & random & gritty but he didn’t want me to take a picture of him so you’ll just have to use your imagination on that one. I’m going back later; I want blow-torched food.

MANNEQUINS The random mannequin parts are all over SAPA. Unfortunately, my website provider isn’t allowing me to upload the pic of mannequin heads in a metal bin. Damn. Boo on technology. Maybe next post. 

PHOTOSHOP Here’s a bit of before & after. Original was taken in the rain on a shitty March morning.

 

*note: since I can’t roll my keyboard to Czech, some of my Czech words are missing appropriate accent marks. So, if per chance you copy/past some stuff into a translator, it probably won’t work b/c of this technical issue.

I just learned a few days ago that there is not only one Vietnamese market in Prague but two! And by market I don’t mean a small corner store that has a few random Asian type supplies. No, these babies are big outdoor markets with lots of stuff. My kind of thing; and it’s also a big bonus to living in an amazing metropolitan area.

I tried to research both of them and came up with some bits on either however, the one that sold me was a review that stated the best Pho in town was at the market in Malesice (Praha 10). The other market is in Praha 4 and is perhaps larger but it was the Pho reference that got the win. So, since I live at the super awesome location of the Namesti Republiky metro stop, getting around is a snap. Trams and buses are equally convenient (and the trams run EVERYWHERE) but the metro is obviously much faster and avoids street traffic. ( *As an aside, the metro escalators are LONG. Seriously. Fucking huge. And they go fast. I’m impressed with the speed that little old ladies scoot their little legs onto the moving behemoths. Google a vid of the escalator at the Narodni Trida stop. Wikipedia says it’s the longest escalator in Prague and according to their list, the 3rd longest in Europe. Actually, I think it’s #3 in the world and it registers at 290 feet. Ok, you get my point.) So, I got on the yellow line and transferred to the green line and took it to the end to the Depo Hostivar station. (I took the yellow to the west end last week and it took much longer than the green line east. I went to the massive IKEA near the Zlicin station and that trek took approx 40 minutes and that’s coming from my central location.) Once at Depo Hostivar I had to wait for bus 208. Weekend tram/bus/metro schedules are different than the weekday ones–read: LESS frequent. I arrived just after a bus left so I had to wait around for another 30 minutes until the next run. Boo. Oh well. At least I was up at ass-thirty this morning so I was prepared for my day.

I arrived at the market around 10:30am which was great because the place wasn’t very busy yet and the vendors were all setting up for the day. Upon entry, there is a guard gate that well, um, isn’t very menacing. Based on the Pho-happy review I read, I was prepared for this gate situation and what they reported was exactly true. To be granted entry I think you are supposed to have a Zivnostensky List (also called a z list–it’s a type of paperwork given by the government to people who run their own businesses, etc.–I can discuss this in a later blog). The gate didn’t check credentials or any passersby so I walked right in.

On either side just past the entry are various shops. This place wastes no space in the mantra to SELL SELL SELL! Past that area are big stalls selling yet more stuff. They are essentially long hallways labeled alphabetically A-F. Each aisle is about 100 yards long. These halls are packed with various vendors of all kinds of things including: shoes, lingerie, toys, purses, clothes, kitchen stuff, socks, candy, etc. All the stalls selling clothing had numerous ‘models’ of their products on miscellaneous mannequin parts. For example, the people selling jeans had about 20 mannequin leg sets all lined up proudly displaying their merchandise. Kind of funny to see so many in a row like that. They were set up almost as if they were about to goosestep their way out the door. In addition to the clothes and random stuff, there are also a few places that sell produce and random Asian food items. I proudly report that 99% of said items were foreign to my naive Caucasian brain; in other words, I have no idea what the fuck they may be. I love that. In retrospect, I should have bought some random stuff to bring back to the flat just to try out. I’m game for that kind of stuff.

At the end of aisle A, just like the review said, there are a few ‘restaurants’ or food stalls. Unlike the retail vendors, the food stalls are enclosed and have small kitchens but they are not heated. I took a seat and a woman started speaking to me immediately. My Czech is for shit. I cannot speak Czech. Can’t. Do. It. My vocabulary base is practically non-existent. I knew what I wanted to order so I just said, “PHO PROSIM,” and then she started saying more stuff. I know she said something about hovezi (beef) but after that I got shit. She started pointing around to more stuff and I replied with, “Nerozumim,” (I don’t understand) and just started agreeing with her. “Ano, ano, prosim.” I pulled a Pilsner Urquell from the fridge and went back to my table. Quickly after, another employee rolled over a space heater for me. Nice move!

The bowl of Pho arrived within a few minutes and it was HOT. Steam was coming off the bowl of goodness in a hardcore way so I waited a few minutes and I surveyed the various condiment options on the table. (*Oh, maybe I should have mentioned what PHO is for anyone unfamiliar….it’s basically a beef broth with rice noodles, sliced meat and various greenery/condiments.) The condiments on the table were as follows: lemon wedges, a bowl of chili oil, Sriracha (hot sauce), sugar, fish sauce and a jar of garlic chili. Sorry, the fish sauce and sugar were too far off to the right for this picture. I wasn’t sure what the garlic chili was until I opened the jar and smelled it. No mistaking that stuff. So, I added everything into my bowl of goodies minus the sugar. I was first hesitant about the bowl of chili oil because I was assuming it was going to kick my ass. It didn’t and I added it twice more. I can happily report the Pho was phoking delicious (bwah ha) and really flavorful stuff. Although I’ve had it in the states before, somehow it felt more ‘authentic’ to have it made at a Vietnamese market. Of course eating the stuff IN Vietnam would be the best experience but I felt quite like Bourdain doing this back-alley dining experience. Pho and beer? 100Kc

Ok, excursion done….back to town. Remember me mentioning about all the mannequin parts? Well, there is a mannequin part store within the market. I didn’t notice it on the way in but what first got my attention was the metal basket of mannequin feet just sitting in the parking area. They were all on metal rods just piled in the bin. I wish I had taken a pic of the feet. Across the way was the mannequin store which, because they sell mannequin parts, displayed said mannequin parts on the sidewalk at the front of the store. It was all somehow ironic, amusing and slightly creepy.

Again, my timing for the bus was shit so I had to wait another good 30 minutes for the ride back to Depo Hostivar. Praha 10 (or at least that part) is quite industrial and um, not pretty. Perhaps it’s more of the ‘real’ Prague but it’s by no means scenic. There are big smokestacks on either side of the road probably polluting the lungs of Czech youths. Call Erin Brockovich, I think I smell class action lawsuit.

I got off the metro at Mustek and walked back to the flat. It’s only a few minutes and walking right through Old Town Square does not get old. It just doesn’t. It was around the lunch hour so OTS was packed with people and their cameras. Note to self: I gotta get to the Astronomical Clock and watch it mark the hour one of these days.

At the end of Benediktska (my street) there’s a cute little cukrarna (sweet shop). I stopped the other day and got some random berry yogurt thing–it was tasty. So, I stopped back again today and got another sweet treat. I can’t remember what it’s called but it looked decadent so why not, right? Under the sugary dome were 2 cookie-like (crunchy) discs with layered chocolate mouse between. There was also a slice of pineapple in there, too. Yeah for sugar!

Back at the flat by 1:30pm–nice work! Naptime.

Ok, it’s 5pm and I’m hungry. Shit. What should I eat? Yes, I should have gone to Albert or Billa and bought groceries. Eh, the kitchen here is kind of weak and I felt lazy. I was still on a bit of an Asian food frenzy so I wanted to find a good Thai place in my neighborhood. I found Orange Moon and it’s pretty much around the corner. Sweet! A convenient option. Out I went. Since I still had my camera in my coat from my earlier adventure, I decided to take some snapshots of restaurants in my ‘hood. Note, these are all literally less than a 5 minute walk from my seat right now. Dlouha street is a popular and somewhat trendy street so there are plenty of good options there…. All the places you see in this image are on or very near Dlouha–thus the colored dots. Sorry, I’m not going to provide links for all the restaurants in this blog. All these photo uploads and Photoshopping bits are taking enough of my time. My brain will fry if I Google them all. But note that in just these places alone the options are: Czech, Italian, Thai, Burmese, Indian, Croatian, Argentinian, French and Afghani.

Orange Moon was my destination but I got sidetracked by a rather unique option. Ariana is an Afghani restaurant. I’m fairly sure that Afghani dining options outside of Afghanistan are limited at best. A good thing about restaurants in Prague is that nearly all of them have their menus posted at the front door. Prices are listed and if you have even a limited Czech vocab (ME!) you can decipher some stuff pretty easily. Menu descriptions are neither flowery nor verbose so it’s not necessary to decipher some bullshit prose a marketing intern wrote. The menu was posted and it was partly in English so it sold me. Although Orange Moon is 15 feet away on the other side of the street, Ariana won out tonight.

So, into Ariana I went! I ordered the Kofta and the Mantu. I wasn’t sure if they would have beer considering the religious status of Afghanis but alas, there was an extensive bar menu. Pils it was. Kofta basically looks like flattened meatballs. They were served in what looked (and tasted) like a tomato-based sauce. Really tasty stuff–oh and also Persian bread was served too. In appearance, I can compare the Mantu to maybe dim sum. They are individual little pockets of dough filled with meat and cabbage. The ‘dumplings’ are topped with split peas, kidney beans, a yogurt sauce and a split pea sauce. The split pea sauce looked and tasted more tomato-y than of split peas. There was also more Persian bread. This time it came with some kind of green herbal paste. My palate could not pick out the components but it was tart and vinegary. Good but different. Ah ha! Google! No complaints though, it was all really quite good and I’m happy I went there. Total tab with tip 310Kc. I’ll be back.

It’s just so awesome that SO MUCH stuff is SO close! This is something I’m not used to and I love it!